As it rolls into late summer, and we begin to harvest more and more from the garden (translation: the zucchini is becoming unmanageable and we start to consider leaving bags on our neighbor’s doorknobs, and running away before they can catch us doing it and try to give it all back), our thoughts turn to the winter holidays. No, it’s not that we don’t have enough to do – there is always way too much to do – but because this is exactly the time to get the winter holidays under control, or at least something resembling under control.
And this means I’ve been dicing a LOT of oversized zucchini. I mean, a lot. Because I do’t have a food processor. Yet. It’s on my list but it will show up in my life when it does, and I’m in no hurry to shell out $200 for a good one, so instead I mince. This is a fair bit of work but kind of mindless and I don’t really mind it.
More concerning is that the zucchini plants keep producing and if I take my eyes away for even 5 minutes they grow to the size of my leg. If I left them there they would probably grow to the size of Godzilla, develop Artificial Intelligence and take over the world.
I pick them to save all of us from that fate. You are welcome.
But back to Christmas and getting that sorted. The monster zucchini and endless chopping is a key component.
‘Sorted’ has multiple parts. The first is budgetary – we’ve done varying degrees of spending on holidays, but we’ve really been working to ratchet it down, both for our immediate family and those around us. Which means a lot of what we do is homemade. This year, Eli will be making some gifts with his woodworking skills, and we as a family always do food gifts. Baked goods, for sure, along with our ubiquitous Peppermint Bark, but there is always food in jars to accompany, along with a handmade tag by my husband. Last year we made infinity jars of Salsa Verde, this year it’s masses of Zucchini Relish.
Here we come full circle to the dicing effort.
By my estimates, we need 16 jars of the stuff and some to keep, but maybe more. I can make 3-4 jars at a time, and each batch takes about 24 hours, because the onions and zucchini bits need to brine in salt overnight. So for right now, each day I make a batch of relish, and then chop the onion and zucchini for the next batch.
Once the 16 – or 20 – or something jars are canned and ready next week, they will be stored for the holidays, which is when everyone wants sweet pickle relish, right? I mean, what’s December without that. But seriously though, this stuff is really amazing, and a complete labor of love.
And then, we will set aside the jars in a cool dark place (translation: box in closet) until it is time to line them up, apply tags and add them to boxes of cookies to share. But the effort will have been expended in August, also the planning. There’s no need to think of what to get the people we love, because it’s there, complete and ready.
Zucchini Relish to Eat and Share
Makes 3 pints
8 cups zucchini, finely chopped or shredded
4 cups finely chopped or shredded onions (yellow or red)
1 tablespoon of salt
Combine zucchini, onions and salt in a bowl. Cover and refrigerate 8 hours or overnight.
Rinse and the zucchini and onion mixture, then add to a large stock pot.
2 1/2 cups sugar
2 1/2 cups vinegar
2 1/2 tsp ground tumeric
3/4 tsp ground pepper
1 tablespoon of mustard seeds (any color)
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1 red pepper, finely diced
1 jalepeno pepper finely diced
Bring the zucchini mixture to a boil for 5 minutes, and then turn off heat and let sit for about 15 minutes, which will allow the relish to thicken. If you have hand-chopped the ingredients, use an immersion blender to process the mixture, leaving a fair amount of chunks. Return relish to a boil and prepare your jars.
Here’s how I do the jars: I fill our water bath canner (this is an old enamel pot, but calling it my water bath canner is both accurate and sounds nicer than ‘old soup pot’) with water, and put it on to heat, immersing pint jars and rings. Wash the rubber lids separately, and don’t boil those.
Bring everything to a boil, and then when you are ready to can, pull out the jars onto a waiting towel. Use a towel you don’t mind getting stained or dirty for this.
Fill the jars most of the way, leaving about 1/2 inch at the top. Wipe off the rims with a wet towel and place the lids and rings on. Be careful, because the jars will be pretty hot between the boiling and the relish. Using a jar lifter or pair of tongs, place the lidded pints in the boiling water bath, making sure there’s enough water to cover them completely.
Boil for 10 minutes, remove the jars and set them aside to cool. Once they are cool, remove the rings and lightly test the lids to make sure they have sealed by pulling on them just a little tiny bit.
Store in a cool place without the rings over the lids.